Sunday, January 28, 2007

Random Thoughts During a Sunday Spent Not Doing Work and Instead Watching MTV and Golf/NBA

1. The "MTV: True Life" series really produces some great unintentional comedy. I'm not even sure MTV starts out with a general concept, like "True Life: I have OCD" or "True Life: I'm a Jersey Shore girl", I just think they do a general casting call, find the most awkward, stupid people they can, and pair them off according to shared personality traits. For example, today they had one about being gay, and it featured some guy from Georgia who was meeting his online boyfriend of six months, and didn't understand the concept of top or bottom when his friends brought it up. As if it's probably not horrible enough being gay in Georgia, add not even knowing how to be gay, and you're looking at a dark hellscape of bad times. Then, some other gay couple got into a huge fight about who ended their myspace friendship online. I was borderline tears laughing. There might be nothing more amusing than two combustibly gay males arguing over a myspace friendship. Somewhere, Isiah Washington from Grey's Anatomy is FUMING.

2. In case you somehow haven't seen it, MTV's "Fat Camp" is the funniest fucking two hours of television ever created. It's a pretty simple equation: Fat kids (funny) + going through puberty (really funny) + fighting (really funny when its kids or fat people, and off the charts funny when its both) + relationship issues = Success. I don't know if they offer this on DVD or if its on demand, but you really must watch it. If you're not fat, it'll maybe make you feel better about the massive disaster that your life has become since you graduated college. I know it did for me. At least until I realized that in 5 years I'll be out of college still and probably fat, when, at the very least, those kids will be in college. Damn it.

3. "Engaged and Underaged" seems like a promising show. The first episode included crazy Christians and overprotective parents, which usually results in comedy. The way that Mom and son interacted almost made me feel better about losing my patience and yelling at my Mom as much as I do. At least I'm slightly less of a pussy than that guy. Oh wait, I still live with my parents. Kill me. Oh well, at least I'm not married. The best part was when the Dad was practically bribing his son $20,000 in trust fund money if he waited another 4 years to get married. It's as if the Dad didn't want to just come out say, "Son, bang as many chicks as you can, I married early and my life is horrible because my wife is a crazy bitch who's life is completely devoid of meaning outside of raising you. Don't let the same thing happen to you."

4. I really enjoy Talladega Nights. A lot. I don't get why more people don't rave about this movie. The number of hilarious "I like to picture Jesus..." quotes alone is enough to make me buy this movie. Por ejemplo, "I like to picture Jesus with eagle wings and singing lead vocals for Lynyrd Skynyrd with an angel band, and I'm in the front row, and I'm hammered drunk."

5. So apparently 12-pack from I Love New York may or may not be attending Seton Hall Law School in the Fall. I don't know whether to be horribly embarassed that somehow our lives have resulted in us reaching VERY similar paths/goals or unbelievably overjoyed at watching that moron interact socially with people I know. I'm going with the latter. He immediately turns the race for biggest meathead at Seton Hall Law on its head.

6. Another stellar episode from Maui Fever. Corbin deserves his own show. He clearly leads the league in blackouts. I also enjoy the over-the-top bitch factor that Chaunte brings to the table. I like her. She's a bitch, but whatever, I'd party with her.


At 1:01 PM, Anonymous beutj said...

anthony (i think) claims that he saw petey from fat camp on the el in chicago a few months ago. i'll let him flesh out the story on here later, just wanted to get it out now though.

also i just spent the last 20 minutes completely ignoring anything at work and trying to find fat camp clips on youtube. fuck.

At 1:33 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

At 5:22 PM, Blogger Mr. Intensity said...

Oh, goddammit, now THAT is fucking comedy.

At 5:23 PM, Blogger Mr. Intensity said...

Oh! an appearance by Petey 1:35 in! yesss

At 5:26 PM, Blogger Mr. Intensity said...

Apparently her body "wants her" to weigh 204.5 pounds! This is tremendous!

At 5:26 PM, Blogger Mr. Intensity said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

At 5:28 PM, Blogger Mr. Intensity said...

Skynyrd takes her to a higher place. It is truly life-altering and frightening. And this dumb chick won't even take part in the big relay thingy! "I just chill out up here in the air conditioning".

At 5:28 PM, Blogger Mr. Intensity said...

AND..she takes credit when her team wins. Perfect.

At 6:30 PM, Blogger Sarah Haberman said...

That was HILARIOUS! I almost fell off my chair when the not-so-terrible-looking counselor took off her shirt. And "Now I've got curves instead of just fat"?!?!?!?! Really????? That was amazing.

At 8:48 AM, Anonymous Rachel said...



Oh, Haberman, you are a delight.

At 11:52 AM, Blogger David L. Bickel said...

i think kuiken just set a record that will never be broken... most consecutive times replying in a thread. 5 in a row. the deleted one is null in my opinion.

how have they not made a sequel of this? would any of us not watch the next summer? when petey and marisa are apparently back at the camp as counselors? is there a bet i could make that petey went after the camper girls when he was a counselor... or that matt came back and beat petey up finally? i mean, where is the part 2?

also, season 2 premiere of two-a-days tonight... get JACKED.

also, that brody kid in the hills has such cheeseball game. i mean honestly.... how does LC not see through this? just call me LC.

At 3:28 PM, Blogger Chubbs said...

Yeah, Brody's game in the last episode of the Hills was terrifying. I guess it helps though that he's a model, really rich, and is famous


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